A hung parliament? What’s the size of a parliament’s manhood got to do with anything?

In the first election that has resulted in a hung parliament since 1974, very few people know what the hell it actually means.

The short explanation is that a hung parliament means that no single party has an electoral majority, as 326 is the required amount and the nearest to that is the Conservative party with just over 300.

This problem is the reason that electoral reform has been called for by some politicians since 1997 because in the UK we use a first past the post system, but the problem is that if no one gets past the post, we enter the unknown territory that we are currently residing in.

So what are the possible outcomes from the results of the election?

Well there’s a big debate over this – the age old legal argument over constitutional technicalities and precedent – but in short, the main options are:

A Conservative coalition with the Liberal Democrats

David Cameron has made an offer to the Lib Dems and this could result in Lib Dem MPs getting some important jobs, as well as guaranteed policy agreements over things such as the economy and political reform.

However, should this break down, Labour may swoop in.

A Labour coalition with the Liberal Democrats

This will result in the same as the above, only with Labour rather than the Tories.

A Conservative minority government

This is a possibility should all talks break down and will result in Cameron technically being in charge, but not having the parliamentary clout to get anything passed – without backroom and underhand agreements on policy with different members of parliament in different instances.

So where are we with all of this?

Well right now, we don’t have a future leader of the country – Brown is still in office until the talks are finished – and this is wreaking some minor havoc on our economic stability in that, from an international financial point of view, we are becoming a bit of a gamble for investment.

The overall ramifications will eventually come to light in more depth in the future, but as of now it looks like both the Conservatives and the Labour party are in a new minor race of their own, aiming to form a coalition first so that either Cameron or Brown can continue to run the country.

Barry Sheerman, Member of Parliament for Huddersfield since 1979, held onto his seat last night but with a much decreased majority of just under 4,500.

Sheerman, who has made many visits to Queensgate campus to partake in debates and give lectures, last week made a surprise visit with foreign minister, David Miliband.

Sheerman’s share of the vote has decreased since the 1997 election, where he then had a majority of over 15,000.

In 2005, that majority fell to just over 8,000 and was last night closed by Conservative candidate Karen Tweed to 4,472.

Foreign and Commonwealth secretary David Miliband today visited Huddersfield campus to meet staff and students.

Miliband, who has been tipped to replace Gordon Brown as the next Labour leader for some time, faced questions on contemporary foreign affairs.

After speaking to staff and students, Miliband was hurried away to be interviewed by the BBC, but was questioned again on leaving about Britain’s place in the EU and the lack of referendum on the Lisbon treaty.

Miliband was joined by local MP Barry Sheerman who has attended debates and given lectures at the University previously.

A team of staff members from the Students’ Union joined the Huddersfield teams leaving Bradford in defeat with a vow to come back stronger next year.

The team, comprising President elect Matt Christie, VP elects Andy ‘Frodo’ Blunt and Kieran Elsby, Current VP Haneef Rashid and SU staff from the iZone and bar, reportedly turned up to Bradford without goalkeeping gloves or a ball to warm up with.

The match was won by Bradford, 5 – 0.

Matthew Gabrielli, from The Graduate, fought to close the gap, taking one Bradford player to the ground.

Huddersfield was not spared injury when iZone’s Matt Short took a ball to the face.

Undefeated, play resumed and Short continued to pressurise the Bradford players.

Rumours that not all players on the Bradford team were staff in its Students’ Union have since been leaked to the Huddersfield Student.

Huddersfield yesterday again lost to Bradford University in the annual Varsity competition organised by the pair.

Last year, Varsity was won by Bradford for the first time in around 15 years and the cup was also taken from Huddersfield possession after five years.

Varsity sees all sports teams common at the two Students’ Unions go head to head to take the Varsity crown.

The Varsity cup is awared to the winner of the Rugby Union game.

Huddersfield Rugby Union were defeated by Bradford with a score of 17 – 7. Rugby League suffered defeat to the tune of 50 – 4.

In total, Huddersfield won six of the 15 matches played – giving Bradford an overall majority in the competition.

Huddersfield’s teams in women’s and men’s badminton, men’s football, netball, women’s hockey, and cricket all won the games they played.

Varsity will be held next year in Huddersfield with VP Student Activities elect Kieran Elsby taking primary responsibility for its organisation.

The annual Varsity between the universities in Huddersfield and Bradford is off to a sunny start.

Weather forecasts show sun throughout the day with expected maximum temperatures of 11 degrees centigrade.

The competition, won last year by Bradford, starts at 12 noon with games including staff football.

The final game, ice hockey, will be held at 10pm with closing ceremonies shortly after.

The University of Huddersfield is allowing its students to vote on whether to make a switch to Googlemail or to stay with Microsoft.

The Microsoft package, which will be upgraded from the current set up, will allow students 10GB of mail and access to online versions of word, excel and powerpoint.

The Google package, currently used by Huddersfield Student, allows for greater mobile access and access to GoogleDocs, Google’s answer to Microsoft Office online.

The Google package will give students only 7.5GB of space, 2.5GB less than Microsoft but still a vast improvement on the current package.

Students are being asked to vote and provide reasons for their desire to switch.

A ‘Have Your Say’ days is also planned for this month, allowing students to view the two solutions to make a more informed choice.

Today, Huddersfield University campus bore witness to its first ‘Green Day’.

The event, initially linked with a move by the Students’ Union council to grass over the car park outside the SU, was organised by Business students and featured ‘Green’ produce stalls and an art exposition.

The day was piggybacked by Union activity, as the sabbatical team took to the campus to find out what students would like to see the car park turned into.

Among suggestions to make the car park a social space for students, some asked for it to be turned into basket ball courts and one a coal factory.

Proceeds from the day are as yet unknown.

Vote stand set up in iZone providing information on the UHSU by-elections

A cross-campus by-election has been called for the end of March to decide who will take the final place to represent the University of Huddersfield Students’ Union (UHSU) at the National Union of Students (NUS) annual conference in Gateshead.

Applications for the position can be downloaded from the UHSU website and must be signed by the candidate, a proposer and seconder and at least eight other students.

The form must be submitted to UHSU reception by no later than 12pm on Thursday, 18 March, leaving little time for nominations to be submitted.

The results will be decided in a cross campus ballot during the Easter break – on 23 & 24 March.

Last night’s battle of the bands final not only showcased the diverse talent of our students, but also proved that £2 can buy you much more than a pack of Haribo and a Dairylea dunker.

The Graduate was the setting for the evening’s festivities and cheap tins of Tuborg the tipple favoured by many of the chequered-shirt sporting punters. Opening act Rag-Tags decided to kick things off with a folksy set of covers, including violin-soaked takes on well… Aha’s ‘take on me’, Britney Spears’s ‘toxic’ and Linkin Park’s ‘numb’ to name a few. Playing songs familiar enough to keep everyone singing along, but sufficiently tweaked to prevent them from sounding stale, Rag-Tags set the tone for the evening, which was interpreted by most as get pissed and have a great time. And who’s going to argue with that?

Follow-ups White County Line unleashed their visceral breed of two-piece rock fanfare, dryly jesting that their band would be bigger if they had more friends…aww! However, it soon became glaringly obvious that their small size didn’t restrict their sound, as the two quickly commenced hurling tornadoes of distorted guitar and crashing drums into the audiences’ faces. A beast comprised of grungey vocals, intricate riffage and pounding rhythms, White County Line didn’t so much warm up the crowd as smother it in hot sauce.

Other notable performances included that of the disturbingly named Joss, Owen and the Dirt Brown Cowboys. This cracking five-piece reminded everyone that blues isn’t just an old man’s game and provided a stellar performance consisting of both classic covers and original material. Impressively tight considering this was only their second performance, (the first being the previous heat) these ‘cowboys’ would be better described as shit-hot rather than dirt-brown. Delivering a toe-tapping set dripping with colourful licks and soulful kicks, …the Dirt Brown Cowboys ensured that spirits were high enough to graze that awful decor hanging from the ceiling.

It was from blues to jazz thereon with the talented ZSQ taking the stage, which from what my tattered notebook can tell me were ‘awesome’. Although, if memory serves it was not until the subsequent two bands brought on the funk that the student population really started pulling shapes. I am of course referring to TC’s Funky Nuts and previous winners Funk Regulators, both of which came, saw and slapped bass. After a climatic, albeit cheesy rendition of Will Smith’s Wild Wild West, some thought the …Regulators had done it again, but no! What’s this? The Rag-Tags have scooped first place, with the filthy-arse whadjamacallits a close second?! Crikey. Now where’s that last Tuborg…

Ashley Martin